A Dialogue with Dad: Learning to Listen in Prayer

As I've mentioned before, I believe an important part of prayer isn't just asking, or even thanking--it's listening. What might the Father be trying to tell you this afternoon? The other day I asked Him that question and was somewhat surprised with the answer! The following dialogue served to encourage me greatly, but the words He has for me are for you, too--and I hope you find encouragement in them as I did.

On Fear

        

        Do you think Kate is mad at me? She sounded so irritated with everything I said!

        No, she just gets like that sometimes. She's probably just had a shitty day or something.

        I don't know, she hates it when I bring up ______.

        Everything in the world thrives when it takes root in its proper place and all things grow into tyrants when they live where they were never meant to take a single breath. Fear is no exception. For the longest time I couldn't understand this. I only knew fear in the context of spiders, sharks, and scary movies. Fear was the unlit side of a dark schoolhouse, the shadows you hide from and scurry through. But then I saw fear in a place so odd it knocked all my preconceptions on their heads.

        "The fear of The Lord is the beginning of wisdom." (Prov. 9:10)

        The first time I read this I pursed my lips, wrinkled my forehead, and pondered the thing 'til I had to move on, with only more confusion to show for my efforts. I would hear "the fear of The Lord" preached from the pulpit but not know what to do with it. I knew Jesus was loving; was God the Father of the Old Testament someone you wouldn't want to upset because you might piss Him off? Is that what this 'fear The Lord' thing was all about? That doesn't seem like my good God. For years I had no idea what to make of it.

        But I kept coming back to the idea that everything has its proper place. A son who has no respect for his mom or dad becomes the tyrant of a home. A daughter who cares only for pleasing her self quickly grows into quite an uncomely creature. We are the children of God. To grow up well, we need to fear displeasing Him. He has the right perspective on everything in life. He was, before time began. He spoke time and every universe into life. We see but a few short decades through our tiny scope of experience. He perceives all time through every perspective. His desires are the ones to be afraid of walking against. His delights shine fullest joy into the essence of everything they touch. Pleasing Him is the most beautiful object our minds could ever focus on. That sounds strange to our current culture's ears, I know, but remember how he's made us. His joy is to bring us joy, to raise all that exists to its complete maturity, and make us creatures capable of reigning over creation with Him, below Him, to serve and uplift all that is and is not yet.

        Fear with any object other than God only ever leads deathward. When we fear peoples’ thoughts and opinions we get caught up in a furious tornado that tosses us around until we are so disoriented we don't know which way's North. But when we are blown by the Wind of God, His Holy Spirit, we are floated to fresh lands, rich and nourishing. Fear of anything but God is a shackle that keeps us tied to failure. Jesus comes to set us free, free to fear one thing: walking our day without God's voice and presence, alone. It is here that we are free to run into our true identity in Him. It is here that we find life, here that we grow into adults who know light from dark, death from life, nourishment from slow poison. And it is here that we are free to live fully alive. Don't get me wrong, fear is not our focus, not a major player in our thought lives and days. What I'm describing is the only place fear can fill the purpose it was made for. It was not made for us to stress about what our friends think of us, or obsess about whether we’ll succeed in our career, or even necessarily to tremble in the face of danger. Fear has only one good place.

        I see you now Fear. You hold the wide boundary, the border between Love and Death. You are the darkness outside the light that keeps me looking bright full into the radiant face of Love. Keep your place, come not in me. I will fix my eyes on the one who loves--what's more, the one who is LOVE, who defines love, the only one who fully knows all that word contains. I will live in Love. Fear, know your place. Keep your border well.

A Balanced View

       As Christians, we believe in God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. Thanks to the innovative creativity of Tertullian, we call this beautiful paradox the ‘Trinity’ (he invented this word in Latin to help people think and talk about this idea). The difficulty of understanding the way Scripture describes this reality of one God in three persons has been the source of great confusion throughout the Church’s life, not to mention the lives of many individuals. 

        I won’t try to explain here how our Heavenly Father is unified with, yet distinct from the Son and Spirit--that is a massive undertaking which I have no intention of taking under presently. I want to look here at how we act towards the triune God in our everyday lives. 

        A Theology professor of mine once said, “Though we say we believe in one God in three persons, we usually treat him like he is only one and not three or only three and not one.” I’ve noticed something similar in most Church gatherings. Usually, a church focuses prominently on one person of the trinity, while the other two sit hidden in the background nearly forgotten. I grew up in the mainstream protestant side of the Church, where Jesus was the central focus. The Father took a back seat, and Holy Spirit was so far back He was barely holding on to the emergency exit door of the bus as He flailed out the back. Most of the songs, teachings and answers in my Sunday gathering were about Jesus. Many Christians know that the ‘Sunday-school’ answer to every question, no matter what, is ‘Jesus.’

        This may not sound like a bad thing, Jesus being the grand focus and all. But everything has a place and a measure it functions in best. When it is out of its place or experienced in a measure other than its best, there is something lacking in our experience, even if we don’t recognize it. For example, an action or idea may not be wrong because of being vile or wicked, it may be wrong simply because it pushes another thing out of its proper place and causes imbalance in your or another person’s life. If we focus solely on Jesus, we miss out on who He was always emphasizing: His Father. Or we might even be neglecting the very one He sent to us, the one He implored us to look to after He was gone: The Holy Spirit.

        Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection was wholly for the purpose of connecting us, through adoption, with The Great Father. The means by which Jesus did and still does this is through the Holy Spirit and living continually in the Holy Spirit. This is what we were made for. It’s exactly what Jesus worked for and preached His whole life on earth: life as children of the Father in, by, and through His Holy Spirit.

        My point is certainly not that we need to value Jesus less. My point is we need to value the Spirit and the Father more. Or, perhaps it’s the other way around for you. Who in the Godhead do you talk with the most in prayer? With whom do you most often relate? Who do you connect with the least out of the Trinity?

        Are you relating to the Father as His son, or daughter?

        Are you living as a highly valued child of God?

        Are you being led into all truth and empowered to do great things by his Holy Spirit?

        Do you recognize and respond to the Spirit’s voice throughout the day?

        Are relating to your rescuer, brother, and King; Jesus?

        Who do you know the most deeply, and who might you be neglecting?

        Though it’s most simple to focus just on Jesus or the Father, or the Spirit, we mature most fully as we grow in our relationships with all three members of the Trinity. Practice addressing each person in the Godhead individually. Ask The Spirit to show you what is lacking and what is off balance for you here. Ask him to give you a balanced and more full view of life with Him.